Happy Thanksgiving

I thought this might be a good time to post some fun-facts about turkeys:


  • Turkeys love scarves. Turkeys especially love boas made from the feathers of other birds, mainly chickens.
  • Turkeys believe in reincarnation and practice suicidal behavior whenever possible by drowning themselves in the rain or throwing themselves in front of hatchets when farmers chop wood.
  • Turkeys love chick drama. Turkeys made up 85% of the Nielsen Rating systems’ viewing audience of both “Dawson’s Creek” and “Gilmore Girls”. Both shows enjoyed unrivaled ratings success until a sudden spike in turkey exports peaking in 2008.
  • Turkeys are carnivores – not only do turkeys eat bugs and insects but they will occasionally capture and eat stray chickens, their only natural enemy.
  • Turkeys are fast!Turkeys can run up to 40 kilometers per hour and fly as fast as 88 kph making them nearly impossible to catch. Thankfully, the United States still uses the imperial system of measurement limiting the speed of the turkey to only a few miles per hour. That plus the Coriolis effect, which causes the turkeys to run in circles, makes the US the only place where Thanksgiving is actually possible.

Have a great Thanksgiving!


Posted in General Hoo-Ha | 6 Comments

Professional Blogs do NOT require photos.

I feel it necessary to say, “If you have a non-personal, business or professional blog or an advertisement of any sort – it is not required for the author of an article to post a picture of themselves”

Please keep your hands and feet inside the browser window while this train of thought is leaving the station.


Seriously, at least take a poll of people who do and do not know you and ask them if they think you should post your face on or in your blog. Then consider the results of the poll and regardless of the outcome: Don’t post your picture on whatever it is. Just don’t do itContinue reading

Posted in General Hoo-Ha, The Internets | 1 Comment

Post Mayan Apocalypse – Year Zero

It’s almost the beginning of  Year Zero PMA!  I haven’t figured out how to convince the world into using my 13 month Post Mayan Apocalyptic Calendar yet, but it’s just a matter of time…

Spark's Post Mayan Apocalyptic Calendar

Spark’s Post Mayan Apocalyptic Calendar


The perfect calendar of perfection

But wait! Don’t thank me until you’ve read all the ways this can unify the world while simplifying your life!
Continue reading

Posted in General Hoo-Ha | 3 Comments

Murphy Christmans!

Okay, so here is the obligatory Murphy Christmans Post to you all!

Happy Christmas and New Years to all of you Ol’ Skool Players, families and new friends too.

Have fun, be safe,

-Spark E



Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Comments